A Canadian Hamburger
by Rikax4502
Summary: AU. Alfred finds out that he's actually Canadian.
1. Chapter 1

A/N Oh. My. God. I wrote a fan fiction. No, I didn't only write it, I _posted _it. -dies- This is so unlike me. Uhg. Well, it's my first fanfic nontheless, so you have to be nice or you won't get a cookie. ~

Anyway, this was inspired from reading a bunch of AU-fics where Matthew and Alfred are twins. But that would mean that one of them had to come from the same country as the other, and from that I got this weird scene playing in my head about how Alfred found out the -well, sort of- truth.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Hetalia or the characters used. If I did, I would probably mess up world history.

* * *

Alfred adjusted the lens to the telescope.

_Perfect!_

He was well prepared for the meteor shower that was going to take place tomorrow night; it was all he had waited for since he found a weird psychic's book at the library, where it had been written that during exactly this meteor shower an alien would land on the planet. Now, Alfred wasn't a fan of psychics and such, but his greatest wish had been to meet an alien ever since he was a little boy, and now he may finally have a chance of doing so.

"Alfred? Are you up?" a mellow but yet anxious voice called.

It was his twin brother Matthew. Matthew was very kind, but he wasn't often noticed because of Alfred. They looked alike, aside from their hair, Matthew had a more curly hair that their father had designed for him. Alfred was more loud and troublesome, therefore, quiet little Matthew didn't often get any attention. Sometimes even their own parents forgot him, but most of the time they just thought he was Alfred, causing him to take the consequences of Alfred's radical actions more than once.

Alfred grunted and opened the door.

"Yeah, breakfast yet?"

"Ah… yes, but mother's making it so…"

Alfred wrinkled his nose.

"I don't want it then."

He was just about to close his door again, thinking about how he could buy something to eat before school started, when Matthew stopped him.

"Please Alfred… she's in a really bad mood so…"

Alfred sighed. He and his brother were adopted at a small enough age to not remember a life where they lived anywhere else, but their adoptive parents weren't exactly… normal. Their father was a blonde, bearded man; he was working for a fashion magazine, and never wore any clothes that wasn't 'in'. He always seemed to pull roses from out of nowhere - even if they had no such plants anywhere in the house. Well, there had been once, but their mother refused to water it and no one else bothered either, so it died. He was also sometimes… perverted, to pretty much everything that moved. But he wasn't home that much, and when he was he actually treated his two sons pretty kindly.

Their mother was strict and serious. But she had the biggest eyebrows ever, she was the world's worst cook, and she believed in all sorts of weird things like unicorns, fairies and trolls. Alfred had noted the days when she was supposed to have her period so that he could plan to live at his friend's during that time.

But even though the family wasn't really normal, Alfred liked it there.

He finally agreed and followed his brother down to the kitchen, if he was lucky he could try to talk himself out of eating it all, and then go eat breakfast at the McRonalds that was about a five minute walk from his school.

In the kitchen, his mother was serving burned scones at their respective plates, together with a cup of tea.

"Mum? Could I get coffee instead?" Alfred said carefully, he really couldn't face school if he didn't have caffeine in his body, but his mother just glared at him.

"Caffeine is bad for your health." she said with a low tone.

"I know… but can I?"

"No."

"But Mum…"

"Isn't it beautiful weather outside?" Matthew said to disrupt the chances of an argument.

"No, it's snowing." Alfred pouted.

"But snow's nice!"

"Just because you're Canadian…"

"But Alfred, you're my twin brother. If I'm Canadian that means you are too!"

Suddenly a silence befell on the room. Alfred was staring widely into nothing. _What?_

"Martin" their mother said, not even caring enough to get the name right. "Go to your room."

Matthew looked a bit hurt, but still happy to have an excuse not to eat the burned scones, and rose from the chair and ran towards his room to make himself ready for school.

"Mum… is that true?"

"No… well… you're almost fifteen, it's time you should know…" she refused to look at her son, and instead focused her eyes on the green teacup she was drinking from.

"Am I Canadian?"

"… yes."

Alfred rose, and got the chair to fall down in the process. Then he ran to his room, ignoring his mother, who were crying out his name.

'_It's not true, it's not true, it's not true.'_

He locked the door, and looked around. On the walls there were Warvel-posters of all his heroes, the ones that he had dreamed of becoming like, on the desk was a picture of him eating a burger, and he had shelves filled with movies about aliens and wars.

This couldn't be true.

He covered his face in his hands and curled himself to a ball.

_This couldn't be true…_

_

* * *

  
_

A/N: Poor Alfred. :( Can't be easy finding out you are Canadian.

P.S: Fear the might of Arthurina's period!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: This chapter was a bit harder than the last one. One thing is that I wrote it from Matthew's point of view, and I will probably write the next chapter that way too. Also, I have the third chapter more planned out, so it will come out sooner (Hopefully, don't trust my word OTL). :) This one is a bit longer than the last one. Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

Alfred didn't come to school that day, so Matthew put a lot of energy on worrying about him. But on the bright side, the lack of Alfred led to more people paying attention to Matthew. A brown haired, kind boy even spent time on having a conversation with him, but was after a while dragged away by a blonde transvestite. The time passed rather slowly, most of the kids seemed happy that there was finally some peace and quiet in the classroom though. And now when he thought about it, Matthew wasn't so unhappy either.

-

When Matthew came home he noted the light blue car that was standing outside.-

_Papa's home!_

He went inside and threw his backpack on the floor. He expected to hear arguing - as his papa and mother fought about pretty much everything - but instead he heard mellow talking coming from the living room.

"I just don't know what to do, he won't open the door!' Matthew heard his mother say.

"Just give him time, and he will…" his papa began in his French accent, but then he saw Matthew standing in the doorway. "Mathieu! Welcome home, how was school?"

"It was fine. I got an A on the math test again…"

Matthews's mother had now turned to face her son, and she was smiling brightly.

"That's my boy!"

"He obviously got it from _my _superb raising skills!"

"From you? Don't make me laugh, you are not even home half of the time I spend time with our children."

"If I manage to raise them without being around, I must be great, and by the way, at least _I_ know my own son's name."

"Are you implying that I'm not? I know the name of my sons! Alfred and Mark!"

"Mathieu", Matthew's father corrected.

"That's what I said!"

"How's Alfred?" Matthew said, interrupting the fighting couple.

"I'm not sure… he still hasn't come out of his room, I even tried bribing him with hamburgers. But for the first time, that didn't work, his only reply was 'If I'm not American, what's the point?'"

Matthew sighed, why was Alfred taking this so serious? He went up the stairs to his brother's room, and carefully knocked on the door.

"Go away", he heard a shaking voice from inside; it was obvious that the non-American were crying.

"I have homework to leave to you", he tried.

"I don't want it!"

Well, it wasn't as if Alfred did his homework either way.

"Alfred, you must come out sooner or later, does it even really matter whether you are American or not?"

On that, the door finally opened. Alfred stood there, looking furious with puffed eyes and a wet face, his hair was tangled and he still wore his pajamas. He glared madly at his brother.

"It. Matters.", he said through his teeth. "I have gone through my entire life being the ideal American, and now someone comes and tells me I'm _not_? You have no idea how that feels!"

At this, Matthew could feel himself getting just a little bit pissed off.

"Well, I have gone through my life being ignored instead, because _you_ are always showing off, or as you call it 'being the perfect American'. You have no idea how _that_ feels either, but you don't see me sitting inside my room crying about it!"

They had a glare-fight a couple of minutes, until Alfred looked away, he bit his lip.

"Well, I'm soon to find out, aren't I?"

"You don't have to become like me just because you are Canadian!"

"You know, Matthew, you just don't get it", and with that, Alfred slammed the door.

-

The next morning, Matthew didn't bother with waking Alfred up. He would probably just sit on his room crying again, making the whole thing an excuse to skip school. But when he got to the kitchen he got a major surprise. Alfred wasn't only up like a bird, but he was sitting by the dining table and doing the math homework that Matthew had dumped outside his room yesterday. He also wore a thick sweater that Matthew recognized as his own. (When did his brother steal that?) Alfred looked up at him and smiled.

"Good morning", he said politely.

Matthew wanted to respond, but he just gaped. This was like a scene out of one of those dreams, that kind of scene that came just before the singing teddy bears started eating each other. He then noted that Alfred was eating pancakes - with maple syrup.

"I made some for you too!" Alfred said and shoved him a plate of pancakes. "Father left early, and mother is picking up her dry cleaning. That means no scones for us!"

Since when did Alfred make Matthew pancakes? Both of the twins were fond of pancakes, of course, but whenever Alfred made them, he 'forgot' to make them to the rest of the family - AKA Matthew -, causing the unfortunate twin to have to make his own, and since their kitchen was pretty small, he had to wait for his brother to finish his first.

"Thank you…" he said and dug in to the meal.

They ate in silence, but Matthew quickly noticed that his brother frequently looked up at him. He also noticed other weird stuff, well, weird for being Alfred. But when he caught hiimself paying attention to the fact that the thick strand of short hair that stood up from Alfred's head were slightly different, he decided that he was overthinking it all.

-

It was as they arrived at the school that the worries really started to boil up inside the small Canadian. Alfred hadn't talked about his… 'Nation change' since the day before, but if Matthew was right, it was still eating him up. But Alfred only smiled as he entered the classroom, he even greeted politely at his teacher, but it was from then everything started going insanely weird. First sign was that his brother actually sat down beside him.

Matthew mostly sat alone in school, not because people didn't like him, no, he was kind and generous, but still, his brother always stole the little attention he had the luck to get. Even his closest friend, a Cuban that was one year older than him, often mistaken him for Alfred - who the Cuban boy hated.

Alfred mostly sat together with his friends, but now, he was sitting beside Matthew, anxiously drawing scribbles in his notebook.

"Hey Alfred!" a voice called, it was Feliciano, a cheerful and energic boy who often talked about pasta and such. "Why don't you sit over here?"

Second sign was the way Alfred responded.

"I'm sorry… maybe… maybe later?" and Matthew swore he saw him blush.

It was only a small sentence, and nothing no one would really care about if it wasn't Alfred. But it was Alfred, so Feliciano looked at him in a weird way before turning back to cling to a blonde, muscular man.

"Alfred, did you say something? If you want to tell us something, you can say it before the entire class", their teacher said.

This was the time that Alfred would mostly come with a clever remark, but he didn't. He just looked down into his desk.

"No miss…"

This wasn't an answer the teacher was expecting, that's for sure, but she dealed with it.

When Matthew was sure she wasn't watching them, he turned to his brother.

"What's the matter?" Matthew asked, because honestly - he was tired of his brother acting strange.

"I don't know what you mean…" Alfred said and drew teeth to the dog he had been scribbling on.

"Why are you acting so strange?"

At this, Alfred looked in his eyes with a serious expression.

"I'm just acting Canadian."

_Oh, okay…_

_Wait, _what_?_


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Ugh. This is the final chapter, and, I know that it's annoying when authors put down themselves, but I really didn't like this chapter. It all went to fast and stuff. But we'll see if I get myself to edit it later. ;) And I know I said that this chapter would be out sooner but... I don't know, I guess I just have a life or something, creepy. .-.

* * *

More and more people seemed to notice the change in Alfred, well, not surprising. He _was_ acting like how he thought Canadians acted after all. How he thought _Matthew _acted. It was so nice to have a brother that imitated you. Not.

Anyway, Alfred was truly driving his brother insane, so Matthew decided to have a chat with his brother.

"Alfred, you…" he began, but said person cut him off.

"I know what you're going to say." Alfred said and rolled his eyes, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You do?"

"Well, of course! You are going to tell me that my impersonation of Canadians sucks, and that I need to go and kiss someone-not-so-cool's behind. Right?" he didn't seem to notice himself that he had dropped his stupid imitation and gone back to just being stupid.

"… Well yeah, something like that."

"But you know, I can act how Canadian I want, because guess what? I _am _Canadian!"

Matthew sighed.

"The thing is though, Alfred, just because you are from another country doesn't mean you have to act as everyone around you expects you to."

"You're right…"

"I am?"

Alfred never ceased to surprise him.

"Yes, I understand what I have to do now." Alfred grinned widely at his brother. "I don't have to be Canadian. I just have to fly to Canada and convince them to become an official part of the US of A!"

... No, as pointed out, Alfred _never _ceased to surprise him.

-

And that was the reason that the curly-haired blonde was now sitting on a plane to his home country to have a meeting with the prime minister. How Alfred afforded to go to Canada was beyond him, and that he managed to get them to meet the prime minister was even more unbelievable.

"So… how did you get a meeting with the prime minister?" Matthew said carefully.

"Contacts."

Matthew decided that he may not want to know the rest, so he let it go.

"You know, you don't have to make the countries merge to…"

"I don't want them to _merge_; I want Canada to become a _part _of the US." he was being careful about his choice of words.

"It's not that simple you know…"

"You know what's not simple? Not being American."

"But…"

"Look Matthew, are you going with me or not? Because either way, I _will_ meet with the prime minister."

Matthew didn't think it was such a great idea to leave Alfred alone right now, especially not if he was supposed to meet the prime minister of Canada, so he sat down and shut his mouth.

-

The plane had been delayed, so they pretty much had to run all the way to meet the prime minister, once there - 15 minutes late -, Alfred blurted out the words like a machine gun, without even waiting for a "Hello".

"… and with that, as a… well, _proud, _Canadian, I decide that Canada should become the USA's 51th state!"

The prime minister just gaped, and Matthew was covering his face with his palm, maybe he should have waited at the airport anyway? He didn't think that Alfred would _actually_ propose such a thing.

"I… wait, who are you? I was supposed to meet with the vice president…" That explained the strange look they'd gotten at the reception. "Anyway, you can't possibly believe that I would take such extreme proposal seriously? How did you even get in here?"

Alfred flinched a little.

"What do you mean? Extreme? You can't possibly say that you've never _considered _it?" Alfred ignored the last question.

"Actually, I haven't. And I don't see how you as a Canadian can do that either. Now, please step out of my office."

-

Outside, Alfred sighed and stretched.

"I think I got him hooked." Alfred said and smirked lazily.

"… What?" Matthew asked in disbelief.

"Well, didn't you see his face? He's totally considering it, I don't get that he hadn't considered it before! Unless…" Alfred's face paled.

"What, what is it? Unless what?"

"Unless he _has_ considered it, and even tried to do it himself, but he couldn't, because the American government didn't want it…"

"Alfred…" Matthew began.

"Matthew, let's go to the white house"

"Wha… _no_. We're taking it too far. I get it; you're not American, bad for you. But you know what? You are the most American person I have _ever_ met. Nationality means squat to anyone that isn't you, I'm sorry but… just accept it, okay? Just because you're Canadian doesn't mean you have to change anything."

"Matthew… I appreciate that you are trying to support me and all, but seriously, you don't get anything."

"Don't tell me that I don't get anything, okay?"

"I guess I'll just have to do this without your help," he said and ignored his brother.

Alfred started walking in the opposite direction, not caring to look back. Matthew figured he had to stop him, because if he knew his brother right, which he did, he wouldn't stop until Canada and US were one, and he had a strange power of getting as he wanted. If it had been anyone else, Matthew would have just shrugged it off, thinking that the idea was way too silly to ever make anything different. But this wasn't anyone else, this was Alfred, and when it came to Alfred you could never be to careful.

"You are American."

It wasn't really a lie, really. Canada do lie in America.

Alfred turned to stare at his brother.

"_What?_"

"You heard me. Mother and I lied. You are American."

"_What?_"

At least a stunned Alfred was better than the one that tried to mess up the world. Matthew decided to keep the truth secret, and bear it to his grave. Or until the world had become one with Russia.

Luckily, Matthew managed to make Alfred believe him. Thank God (or whoever there is to thank) for stupidity.

-

And life went on as normally. Well, that is, until it became known that their mother wasn't really a woman. But that's another story.


End file.
